Anarchy in the DMG

Dungeons and Dragons. Punk and Prog.

In my noggin, these four things are hopelessly twisted together into the revisionist ball that is ‘old school’ D&D.

 Punks versus Prog

 One is labyrinthine, layered and elaborate. The other is destructive, disrespectful and daring. A 70s dialectic that captures the essence of the dungeon crawl.

Every PCs Motto

Every PCs Motto

 I mean, let’s face it: the most lawful good of Dungeon Crawling PCs wouldn’t look out of place at a Sex Pistols show. These are people who can’t or won’t be a famer, a soldier or a priest. Hell, they can’t even hack it as regular thieves.

 In an old school game, even a Paladin or Cleric of the Great God Goody-Two-Shoes is someone who enters an orc-infested hole in the hopes of killing things and taking their stuff.

 And your average party of grave-robbers cum adventurers is likely to last as long as a garage punk band did in ’78. After a few sessions half of them will be gone and replaced, forgotten except for their garish names and the havoc they wreaked.  

 Clearly PCs are people that your average villager won’t miss.

Pure Proggy Goodness

Pure Proggy Goodness

 Then there are Dungeons.

 Twisting mazes populated by surreal and unlikely monsters.

 Home to glowing jewels, deadly traps and speaking fountains.

 Dungeons are like the intricate synth-fusion operas of bands like Gentle Giant or Rick Wakeman: elaborate, concept-driven and the self-indulgent. They really don’t need to make any sense to anyone but the wizard (or really the DM) who poured their heart into making them.

 A dungeon is a lovingly crafted piece of architecture built by the love of a DM…that will then be soiled and smashed by punk PCs.

 And really, I can’t imagine running D&D any other way.

 Recommend Listening:

 1 2 3 4 Punk & New Wave 1976-1979

 Journey to the Centre of the Earth, by Rick Wakeman

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A Recent D&D Pitch

Fuck Yeah

Fuck Yeah

Live Fast. Die Young. Leave a Level 3 Corpse.  

 
Your parents didn’t want this for you. You could’ve been a farmer, a priest, a sage or a soldier. But you aren’t. Either you can’t live in society or society can’t live with you. That’s ok. Better an interesting life than a long one.
 
Kill Things and Take their Stuff.
 
‘Adventurers’, ‘Dungeoneers,’ ‘Grave Robbers.’ You’ve heard stories about them, even if you haven’t met one. Brave or stupid souls who cross the shattered frontier and loot the treasure left behind in the ruins the Principate. A few of them have become rich and famous. Most end-up bleeding to death in the depths of some forsaken hole or another. It’s a risk you are willing to take.
 
You Met in a Bar.Osric 2
 
Where else would you meet other dysfunctional souls willing to go to near-suicidal lengths for fame, fortune and glory? Besides, who’d agree to loot a monster infested ruin sober?
 
A Hooded Stranger Hired You.
 
He’s the type your parents told you stay away from. But, he’s got a chest of coins and a map to the fallen citadel of one order of scholar-priests or another. You can keep anything you haul out of there and get his reward. All you need to do is grab a full skein of the black liquid that bubbles up from the dark spring in the citadel’s cavernous depths.
 
No School like the Old School.
 
I’d really like to run some old school AD&D, at least for a while. To that end, I’ve picked up OSRIC, a cleaned-up version of the 1st Edition of Advanced Dungeons and Dragons (available for free here). I think it’ll be fun, so let me know if you are willing to give it a chance.

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