Late to the Party A Journal of Not New RPGs, Movies, Comics, TV and Other Nerdy Stuff

Taking it Public

If only gamer nerds had a Miss Manners

So I listened to the Podgecast episode 049 on my way to a job interview this morning. Generally, I love the podge, but this episode was a lesson in hurt. Some things were said during the recording of the episode that were, to say the least, hurtful.

Now I have my own reasons why this incident sticks in my craw, largely due to my own experiences of the New Depression. That said, it points to a good rule in life, work and gaming: Be careful when you make private disputes public.

Generally, if you have a personal issue with another member of your gaming group (or work or what have you) the first person to take it public loses. No one wants to get dragged into a pissing match between two people, especially if they are both friends. So do your best to keep personal conflicts personal and try to resolve them without appeals to the group or any other external authority.

Should that prove impossible, either because of a lack of control on the part of one of the principles or some inevitable spill over, do your best to conduct yourself with restraint. If you start lashing out or calling someone else a jackhole, then you are going to look like a schmuck in the situation. No one has ever lost the esteem of their peers by politely declining to engage in a public shouting match or refusing to fling mud.

So remember: conflicts and disputes come and go, but you still have to look your friends, your co-workers and your gaming group in the eye afterwards.